Hmm, regarding your Doujinshi getting deleted, perhaps it's because the size is low. AFAIK, on the 3rd MT-Maigetsu (Mini-Tokyo Monthly), Doujinshi size must be a lot bigger now, I think, about 800x600 or higher. How to check resolution? Oh, just left click on your picture (more propably your doujinshi) and it should display the pixels. :)
Now, about your artwork, I want to guess three things:
A.You do direct inking to a sketch.
B. This is not conventional (it's too clean to be true x___X;;)
C. A farshot, but perhaps it's done on tablet?
If any of my guesses are correct, revert back to paper.
If not, I can say you use colors really good. Another + to you is that you really draw very clean (I use my shirt to
clean out blank spaces in my artworks, and the studio goes wild everytime I take off my shirt. YEAH BAY-BEH~).
The missing point, again, is *don'tkillmepleasex__x*, proportion. /critic
Again, don't get me wrong, ne, I did said that you should ignore criticism. What I missed saying the last time is
that "What you should ignore are destructive criticisms". And I believe this 'critic' (hell, I have
no right to be a critic) comment is constructive. ^__^
A lot of artists starts at the head. Why? Simple. Because it's the headlines. /oldartistjoke
But no, that's half-true too. I can safely say you also start at the head. Frontal face sketch, IMO, is the hardest
among all face shots. Why? Because you need to at least make both ends meet. And the possibility of making a perfect
face line is almost bleak, if you do it directly. That's why we start at pencil, right?
Remember the coin trick? Even that trick merely minimizes the misproportion, and yeah, I forgot to add details to the trick. XP /gomenasai
After you did the 'first step', use the 'equator' to place the eyes. There's a general rule on the eye space, and it's called 'the three-eye rule'. You draw a 'fake eye' on the middle of your face's equator (remember to draw the 'equator cross' a bit higher on the circle), then USE THAT EYE to guide you on the real eyes. Now, after you did those angelic eyes (yay!), don't delete the fake eye. Use it's edges to find the right spot for it's nose and mouth. Then you may delete it afterwards. That's it for now, I'm kinda lazy typing this comment, but I see talent in you. Don't put down that pen, ok?
BTW, when you say art, it means words translated into an image. When you say 'poetry', it's images translated into words. This is a major flaw in this artwork, as you put the title as "So cooooooolldd". Yeah, I see icy smoke. But other than that, there is not a single part of the artwork, except the gloves (and I am not even sure if she's wearing winter clothing), that states that the scenery is cold. Well, if the ribbon's intentions are to make it cute, it worked fine, but it did not worked for the title. x___X;;
One notable area in this doujinshi is the black spots. The inks are also clean. That made me say "whoa, just as I thought, this one had talent!"
Keep on practicing. I always practice. :)