no, it's quite nice. well, her hand is a little too short, that's all.
Artist Comment
FULLVIEW PLEASE!
I hate this pic, it looks so weird and unprofessional.
But I need feedback in order to improve myself, so i decided to upload it to MT.
Time: 8+ hours
Music: Many many Anime openings and endings
More works: www.uchiki.de
Things that are wrong (and which you don't have to mention anymore):
- Their emotions
- His legs
- Her arm
- Their propotions
Other Indy Art from Yina
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Comments
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I don't know if I am the right person to give you feedback but I'll try it anyway.
I think the problem with this picture is its balance or rather "unbalance". The poses could have been a bit more dynamic (the girl's too stiff) and the proportions need a little fix as well. The guy's legs are too different, for example. If you want to find out such composition problems yourself just flip ('spiegeln') the image horizontally and mistakes show themselves at once (I use that technique very often and it is very, very helpful).
Other than that the picture is very nice. I love, love, love the textures and the sketchy lines. -
ok, couse you are from gerany too i will write this comment in german couse it is easier for me^^
Hmm harakiri hat recht das rechte Bein zum Beispiel ist dicker als das linke, das Maedchen haettest du vllt etwas mehr an den Jungen anlehnen koennen. Ich persoenlich finde die Gesichtsausdruecke etwas eigenartig, zum beispiel das die Mundwinkel so weit nach unten gehn. Irgendwie sehn die beiden nicht grade gluecklich aus. Es erscheint mir auch so als haetten sie sich grade erschreckt, da beide die augen so weit aufreissen. Aber die coloration sieht wirklich schoen aus, die Farben harmonieren gut mit dem rest.
Die augen vllt etwas kleiner und die linie vom mund etwas kuezer wuerde das gesicht schon anders wirken lassen, teste es einfach mal^^
Ich hoffe wir werden auch das ergebnis sehn, mit dem du dann zufrieden bist, aber eins weiss ich aus erfahrung man betrachtet seine bilder selbst immer kritischer als andere, man kommt nur nie darauf was man aendern koennte -
Their expressions seem a bit too surprised, you know? I think that's the only thing that really bothers me. Other than that, the coloring looks great~
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Everyone says very different things XD I think with this one, the lineart probably could be cleaned up a bit because of the way it's colored, the sketchy lines really jump out at me in a bit of an odd way. Or at least, maybe have it look consistently messy. The lines around their heads aren't that bad, but around his hand it's noticeably messier. The girl looks a bit off too... I can't quite put my finger on it, but something about the proportions around her neck and how her shoulder is jutting forward, with the amount of back that's showing... I don't know if it makes any sense, but anyhow, it's still a great drawing overall ^^
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One of the guy's leg is smaller than the other, the two are a bit skinny but other than that i think it's all perfect ^^
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Yes, it does seem that one of the guy's legs is thicker than the other. But these types of things happen to me all the time when I draw and when constant erasing is required, sometimes you just can't bother. Great art, though. =3
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I'm sorry if I'm saying the same thing as everyone else , (no time to read all comments) but the most important thing is their expressions . they seem very close , like a couple (esp as the girl is pulling the guy's tie xD) , but their faces are rather blurr looking . it lacks emotion . (maybe it would help if both their faces arent too side-looking .. like , it makes the artwork kinda flat ... urgh I can't explain well Dx ) the girl's arm and the guy's proportion also needs some fixing . other than that , it's nice ~ u already have great cging skills and all , so keep it up ~ :3
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I think the texture hides your characters details and doesn't make them shine or make them the stars of the artwork. I believe you should of limit the texture for the clothes or background because it doesn't suit the skin or hair to me. If the texture is the result from the paper, then maybe clean out the texture from those areas.
I really like the concept and I know that I can't really see the coloring too well, but it does seem to be done very nicely. :) Don't put your artwork down Yina. I know you can improve because it's not that bad. Keep it up and congrats for the effort. ;)
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