Original Anime Wallpapers
.:I Had Lost Myself:.
.:I Had Lost Myself:.
By Kairi-Hearts
- Submitted:
- 8wk 1d ago by Kairi-Hearts
- Category:
- Original
- Official Creator:
- Type:
- Anime Wallpapers
- Resolution:
- 1,600x1,200
- Size:
- 535 kB
- Views/Downloads:
- 1,089/150
- Comments/Favorites:
- 16/51
Dedicated to my best friends, one of them being erika
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I've lost myself. I've lost myself in this vast
crowd.
There are lots of people walking in a hurry, others walking very slowly.
There are even people completely stopped. It's a lot of people...
They all walk their own paths. They walk towards the future...towards
tomorrow...
All, except those who have stopped...that are standing still, quietly...
Why are they like this? Are they tired? No strength left? Are they discouraged?
Or they simply fell down and can't get up? Or are they afraid of giving a single
step forward? And those walking? Why are they doing that?
I've lost myself. I do not know if I shall continue walking forward....towards
tomorrow...
Because right now..I've stopped. I've stopped walking and became a simple statue
like the other people around me.
We, who are standing still, are of a lesser amount.
Why did I do this?
My pride has been stepped on, my will crushed...the eyes that I use to observe
my surroundings have been ripped....the words I use to communicate have been
cut....my sympathy and good mood are now bitter....I've become cold...
Are these the reasons I stopped? Or is it simply the fear of continuing to
fight?
-------
(Forgive my poor english in the text above)
This was something I wrote while I had that depression last year (which ended
near February).
This is an original work of mine. It began when I saw a simple mask falling down in Persona's second opening. I love the simbology masks can have, and I decided to do something with it.
I did the sketch on Photoshop here and vectored it (and the mask). I was too lazy to vector the wavy hair like I originally planned, so it ended up being rather simple.
It's mostly brushwork, that's why it is a bit blurred. Used the dodge tool to make the highlights on the skirt and socks.
I had a lot of problems for the background. I didn't have any imagination at
all. All I could see was black, but I wanted to put shadows so black wasn't a
good choice. I made several studies, but failed.
Erika came up with an idea that involved water and reflections. I went with that
idea, but I still thought something was missing...
So this is all I could come up with. Floor, shadows, the girl walking towards
"the light" 
,
meaning a new beginning.
I hate hypocrisy and lies. I hated myself for pretending to be fine when I had this huge depression. This work represents that part of my life. No more acting. I explained to my friends my situation but only a few answered back...I dropped the mask of "happy girl" and fought...again...
C&C is welcome as always. Especially about backgrounds....I suck at bgs
(mostly at perspective )
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...wow 0_0 You just really got me with this wall. Mostly with what you wrote at the top there. Because I can relate to it so much, it's freaky. I've stopped walking. I'm standing still. And I'm still wearing the mask. I know what it's like to be there. So of course this wall has totally captured me. And I'm amazed this is an original. It's awesome; the painty vector, the warped perspective, the mask symbolism. The whole thing is awesome! A new big fave for me. Wonderful work Kairi-chan.
Wow, I agree with Ash on this one...so much emotion
and it seems you've hit us both spot on. I also understand so
greatly what it feels like to be there in that cold street. You've
captured such a deep feeling in this wall and it almost makes me kinda
feel like a crybaby right now ^^;
Great job making, constructing and putting it all
together. I've felt it but wasn't able to wall it and I'm
really happy to see someone was able to get "that" feeling out.
Great job, it's so awesome <3
Lovely job. The emotion you went for is definitely there. It gives a sad feeling, but most of all hope. Great work
This wall is so cool..I like the idea very much...
I like the text you wrote there...it's so full of emotion...Good job,Kairi-san
aaawwwww I'm touched >///< <33
I glad you endend up choosing this background, 'cause it suits very well with the original vector
I really loved it and you know it
Thanks for the dedication, I really appreciate it
oh my! who is she? from persona?!i think she's the 'ayane-chan'!......(just a guest!)
xD!
where did you get this mask for the background?!
seems familiar......(thinking......)
this is a work of art! i know it! gonna be my next layout!on friendster!
Before I had even read your poem, the thought that came to me when I saw the full picture was "no more running..." Maybe it's the way she seems to be walking away with the mask on the floor behind her, there's so much resolve and emotion in this piece. Now I can see that you're both a poet with words and other mediums of art ^_^
I like the idea!
simple
and very expressive! 
nice xD
Yeah...it is impossible,this can so wonderful be.I goggle at it only,how is this fantastic,originality is fully on the top of arts.Invented is this superbly.You're amazing,beautiful job.+fav
WOW
love your vector & your wall is simply amazing
well done & its a fav
plus its a highlight
This work of you is really awesome.
I like the painting style.
It's full of emotions and the text you wrote is also great.
Well, I have to admit I can relate to it.
The orange hair and the mask reminds me of code geass r2 episode 13
i loved this mask on the floor *-* very nice!
cant believe i forgot to comment this.
drawing is so cool and i especially like the mask.
great job!
wow, this is very moving... something about the wallpaper itself especially... I'm surprised that this is original too. Really well done. Better drawing + computer skills than I ever can combined.